My family and I have gotten back from a vacation recently and I'm so glad to be back. I realize that he didn't mean it but our son had a bad last two days away from home.
My mother-in-law was hosting us for the last week or so of our vacation and we stayed at her house over night before our train ride home. That day had been a bit disappointing because we had planned on going to the pool before we left but it started raining before we could leave the house. Since we couldn't go swimming we spent a small amount of time at the playground before heading back to her house. After dinner I told my ds he needed a bath so we went up stairs. He asked if he could take a shower instead and I agreed. He rarely prefers a shower over a bath so I was glad that he was being a bit open to things... until it came time to turn off the water and get out. He refused. He started yelling NO! as loud and annoyingly as he could. It was way past his bedtime by now and I knew he was tired so I insisted as gently as I could that the water was getting cold and he would be cold soon too. Again he yelled NO! and slammed the shower door shut. I was tired and a little frustrated so I reached in and turned the water off which made him start freaking out. He yelled and cried and slammed the shower door repeatedly. He was mostly inarticulate with his upset, just yelling no over and over and since I couldn't reach him due to the shower door obstacle I tried to sooth him with a compromise of turning the water back on if he would let me wash his hair.
He calmed down for a moment to think about it but we were interrupted by my sil coming in to tell us goodnight before she left. I asked him if he wanted to say goodbye since he wouldn't get another chance but he silently shook his head and as soon as she had left the room he was full force again. His yelling got worse and I started to panic, thinking that my mil would probably think I was torturing him up there so I desperately grabbed him out of the shower and wrapped a towel around him tightly to protect myself from his arms flailing while I bear hugged him to try and get him to calm down. He kicked me very hard in the knee a few times but eventually this worked to get him to calm down. He was almost ready to talk again so I eased up pressure a bit and he started trying to talk but he was still upset so it came out as single syllables and nonsense. I gave him a moment to collect himself just reassuring him that it was ok to be upset and just tell me what he wanted.
He started asking if he could get back in the shower and I reminded him of our compromise. He got upset again so I asked if he would rather go get ready for bed and have Grammy read him a story. This seemed a favorable alternative so we left the bathroom. He got dressed and ran over to my mil with a book asking to have her read to him but she told him no and started asking him if I had hurt him!
He was confused, poor little guy, and said he didn't know. He had sunburns on his arms and I had accidentally grabbed his arm on the edge of one when I was getting him out of the shower. He remembered this and said I had hurt him but didn't know how to tell her I didn't mean to so she of course assumed the worst. She started telling him that he could come live with her and she was very rude and short with me the rest of the night.
DS being easily influenced by bribes was instantly over the moon at this suggestion and started begging me to go live with Grammy. My dh was completely out of the loop though so he assured ds that he could come visit but never live with Grammy because mommy and daddy would miss him too much. Ds was disappointed but totally over being upset about the shower by this point so I told him it was time for bed. He was excited about riding the train so he didn't put up his usual fight, though it did take him a long time to actually fall asleep.
Our ride home on the train was a little difficult at first but it was made easier after we found a set of four seats facing each other. It was also nice because there weren't tons of people so we didn't have to share our seats with anyone. Otherwise it was very hard to keep ds entertained for the trip home. We had movies and games and toys and pillows but he still fidgeted constantly and kept asking for things we didn't have. We stopped at a station long enough for me to run in and get some lunch for all of us and ds wasn't happy with my lunch choice for us even though it's something he asks for all the time when we are at home. It was obvious he was getting a little nervous about being on the train for so long, so when the train started moving again I started up a movie for him to watch and that seemed to keep him entertained for another hour or so but we still had a hard time getting off the train and into a cab to go the last little leg home. When we got home I had to clean and put things away so he settled into playing a video game.
My dh was worn out from his unaccustomed duty of intervening when ds gets too out of control. It's usually me that does all the redirecting so it was nice to have him there to help out. Dh helped me clean up a bit then rested on the couch with ds while I knit in my chair.
It was so nice to be home!
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